The Other Side of Fear

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Let’s face it – when you get right down to it, fear is at the core of so many of our stuck moments in life. We may be afraid of being the bad guy, being ridiculed or getting fired. So, instead of taking risks, we passively limit our lives. Some might complain instead of solving their problems while others might leave it up to fate to decide. How many times have you said to yourself, “It’s up to the Universe.”? I’m here to tell you that the Universe doesn’t care one way or other and it doesn’t determine what is right or wrong for you. The Universe only gives you what you want. It brings to you a vibrational match to what you are thinking and energetically putting out. YOU are the final authority of your own choices. Therefore, if you want to change your experiences and circumstances it is imperative that you take action and make choices that align with your true desires instead of remaining stuck in fear.

Because of our fears, we tend to avoid new experiences or even give up on our dreams. And, the saddest of all the things we might do to ourselves is to stop standing up for what we believe in. Knowing that fear is at the heart of a stuck moment is a necessary first step towards moving forward.

But, before I get into suggesting some solutions that help you peek at what’s on the other side of that wall of fear, I want to talk about how and why our fears get developed in the first place.

Most of us know that fear is a built-in survival tool that comes from the reptilian part of the brain. I’m talking about the kind of fear that we feel when we are in physical danger. It’s that fight or flight mechanism that instinctively kicks in without needing to take the time to think logically about the experience. It’s just there and really, it’s a good thing because that is what helps protect us in the physical world. It’s that unconscious safety net that kicks in when we trip on a flight of stairs. Instinctively and without conscious thought, our hand immediately grabs for the railing to help save us from tumbling down. Without this part of our brain, we’d never survive this physical realm!

However, there is another kind of fear which is emotional fear. This is where the brain gets confused because now we are involving the heart which can also be considered a brain. Did you know that in the fourth Century, BC, Aristotle considered the brain to be a secondary organ that served as a cooling agent to the heart? He thought the heart to be a place in which spirit circulated freely. In other words, he believed that the source of our consciousness was the heart; not the brain and that the brain was an organ for venting excess heat.

Interesting to think about, isn’t it? I mean, take anger as an example. It is actually an expression of fear. Oftentimes, our anger is when we are pretending to be brave. It is emotional (heart-based) and although we can express anger in different ways, it is expressed and vented from the brain which is making the attempt to soothe and cool the heart. On the other hand, if anger is suppressed it can become toxic and affect the heart if the fear is not healed. That toxic energy can eventually create dis-ease.

Make an attempt to pull your attitude out of the mud and take it to the stars.

Emotional fears are what keep us stuck in the mud. These kinds of fears are based on memories from past experiences. When we have experienced past negative events, our hearts and our subconscious mind can retain that memory which then, in turn, can falsely translate into a worry that the same experience will happen again. Here is an example: a mother gets caught in traffic which makes her very late for picking up her daughter at school. The little girl is left standing alone waiting for what feels like an eternity to a child! She becomes fearful that she’s been forgotten by her own mother. Left long enough, that experience can become a real fear of abandonment that will haunt her for years and even into adulthood. Although the child may have been physically safe, she didn’t feel safe but she may also have experienced from her mind and heart that perhaps on some level her mother did not love her. Once her mother finally does arrive, she feels safe again. However, by the time she’s grown into adulthood, that experience got stuck within her subconscious mind now has created a negative core belief that she is unsafe and unlovable which can then possibly manifest as fear of abandonment and worry of not being lovable. This false, negative core belief can affect her relationships and keep her stuck with making choices that are not aligned with who she truly is in the Now; safe and loveable.

On the other side of the wall of fear is where your True Self resides. In the Light of Truth, fear disappears just like darkness ceases to exist when you expose it to light. Darkness is not a thing, in and of itself; it is merely the absence of light and just like darkness, fear is nonexistent in the Light of Truth. The solution to getting unstuck and to experience your own Divinity is to face your fears.

However, before you can face your fears head-on, the first step you must take is to become aware and acknowledge them. That’s right. Take an honest look at your fears. What are they? If you don’t really know, try jotting down some typical fears that you see in other people like being afraid to be seen for who I really am, afraid to be judged, afraid of failure. Before long, you will start to feel a little “pang” somewhere in your body that’s indicating you have that fear. Tell yourself this is all ok. You can actually rejoice in having this awareness because now you can empower yourself by leaning into your fears so that you can begin to make new choices.

The second thing you can do is to develop the mindset of determination. Begin with examining your limiting thoughts and false beliefs and start telling yourself they are all lies. For example, if you think you can’t do something start realizing that you can! Shape your mindset with set visions and goals and look for powerful role models to emulate. Clearly see where you want to go and then work towards creating a belief that you truly can achieve it.

Thirdly, allow yourself to play with the energies of passion and possibilities which are just on the other side of the wall of fear. Ask yourself: what if, on the other side of the wall of fear, is an opportunity for me to step into my Divine Nature; that which is the True Me? What would that feel like? What does it look like, taste like, sound like? Engage all of your senses for experiencing the new and empowered you.

And, lastly – always remember that most fear is just a worry about something that hasn’t happened yet. Stay in the here and now and know that whatever it is you’re fearing, it is not your present experience, whatsoever.

“Nothing ever happened in the past that can prevent you from being present now; and if the past cannot prevent you from being present now, what power does it have?” Eckart Tolle

Are you ready to see what’s on the other side of fear?

Jolene Hayes is a Certified Soul Realignment Practitioner, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist and Transformational Mentor. She reads your Akashic Records to help you discover your Divine Soul Blueprint and what may be energetically blocking and restricting you from living your desired life.

Get Your Brave On!

Intention and the Flow of Your Manifestations

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In my last couple of posts, I’d written about how the Law of Attraction is not necessarily a stand-alone Universal Law and that perhaps we must also gain a better understanding of some of the other Universal Laws, such as the Law of Karma, Law of Free Will and Choice and the Law of Polarity. I have been writing about the power of our thoughts, discovering our negative core beliefs, expanding our conscious awareness and finally, that whatever we think is possible can become probable. But, how does possibility become probability and how does this work towards aligning with the Law of Attraction? This article addresses the Law of Intention as yet another component to aligning with the Law of Attraction. We have heard the term “be careful what you ask for”, so how many times have you experienced something that you’d asked for only to realize that you said a great big “oops!” in reaction to what you thought you wanted? This question leads me to talk about the power behind crystal clear intention-setting for manifesting your desires in a much more fun and smooth way. So, why is it important to be crystal clear?

Well, for one thing the Universe does not really care what it brings to you, but it does answer to the call of your request; either consciously or subconsciously. Very often, we have attracted people or events at some point in our lives that inevitably turned out to be negative experiences. Let’s take relationships, for example. How many times have you experienced or have heard stories of someone you know who got into a new relationship after putting all hopes and dreams into manifesting the perfect mate? It always starts out as being everything you ever wanted, but suddenly it turned sour. That’s probably because of one or two things that fell out of alignment with what you really wanted and that might be a) you were unaware of any ruling subconscious negative core beliefs or b) it was the way in which you asked. You wanted to manifest that desire, but there was an unconscious internal focus on what was not wanted.

How we communicate with ourselves and how we communicate with the Universe can sometimes be misaligned. When I work with my clients I often ask, what are your dominant thoughts or how are you communicating with yourself? Sometimes what we ask and how we ask can actually be damaging. Let’s say, for example, you are thinking over and over to yourself “why can’t I find my ideal romantic partner/make more money/reduce my weight”? Well, guess what! The Universe is going to provide you with some reason why you can’t! You’ll get some glimpses here and there of what you want to manifest, but you’ll also come across some major roadblocks. Or, here’s something else….you’ll ask questions like “what is holding me back from (fill in the blank)?” or “what are some of my self-limiting beliefs”? Sure enough, you’ll get hit right in the face with those very things. You’ll get a really good taste of what is holding you back.

Of course, discovering our limiting beliefs can be enlightening and healing, but if we dwell on digging and digging and digging in order to clean up absolutely everything hidden in our shadows, we’ll just keep finding more and more to clean up! There is a fine line between discovering what is holding us back and what can propel us forward. This is where creating your intention becomes important. What you ask for and how you ask for it are very important to creating what you want. Not to mention, so many of our desires involve obtaining tangible “things”. How we get those things can come in a variety of ways and packages.

So, I think a good place to start is to ask yourself, “what would I like to experience?” or “how do I want to create and experience myself while manifesting my goals”? When I read the Akashic Records, I help you discover how you can align yourself to your own, unique way of manifesting so that your experience will flow with less effort. Understanding who you are at your Soul level helps you to know how you can more easily navigate your human experience. Honing in on what and how you would like to choose your experiences not only simplifies the goal-attaining process, but it gets you focused on your truer desires, how you want to experience getting TO your desires, and even makes you aware of how you want to express your Divine Nature. If I were to examine the saying, “we’re spiritual beings here on this planet having a human experience”, I would definitely focus on the “experience” part and put efforts towards exercising the Law of Free Will and Choice. In other words, we are here to experience being human! So many are missing out on their spirit’s true intention of simply having the human experience; thereby doing what I call “spiritual-bypass.” Whatever you focus on expands so why not begin focusing on solutions and the results you want to experience? I’m sure you would agree that it’s much more fun to ask for solutions that guide you towards your desired outcomes other than to focus on your problems or lack. This means you have to know what it is you want to create and how your Soul wants to experience your human roadmap that leads you to that creation.

When the Possibility that Everything Gets Better Becomes a Probability

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I have been curious about possible gaps in the Law of Attraction (LoA) and the way in which many people may perceive it and practice it. Now, first of all I want to make clear that I will not be bashing this amazing Universal Law as I know that there are many people experiencing their alignment with it. Nor am I challenging any of the amazing and profound channelings that have come through on the LoA. But, for many years I have been engaging in lengthy conversations about this subject, wondering if anyone else suspects that something seems to be missing in the understanding and implementing of the steps of Desiring, Asking and Allowing.

This is the second of three articles on this subject that addresses possible, and perhaps practical bridges to some gaps the LoA. As in my first article, the first possible bridge was about thinking the thoughts, but how our thoughts actually go way below the surface of our everyday awareness and right into the subconscious. What gets created there can be negating core beliefs. I end that article by mentioning the possibility that everything gets better can become a probability, so that’s where I’ll start here.

Several years ago I woke one morning with what I call a “knowing” or a “revelation” in that there really is no such thing as negative energy in the way we normally perceive negativity. It was one of those spiritual revelations that you just know something but you can’t quite put it into words and you’re not exactly sure how to apply it to your life. It was such a short and sweet little channeling that to describe it to anyone else would not give it justice in comparison to the profoundness I experienced in the knowing of it. I didn’t realize it then, but I’m now wondering if it was related to the Law of Attraction – one of those bridges to the “gaps” that I’m talking about. “There is really no such thing as negative energy” and how that now translates to me is that I have always felt that no matter what, we as human beings are at all times on a positive, ever-evolving spiritual quest; whether it is conscious or unconscious and that it is our perceptions that bring about judgment and labeling.

Some of us are more “awake” and some have yet to open the door wider. But, if we choose to believe this even our perceived mistakes and bad choices can be considered as positive experiences in that they will eventually catapult us into a great sense of self-awareness and growth. We then feel we MUST seek out things that get better! I believe that no matter what the evolutionary level of the individual Soul, we are all still heading or at least trying to head in a positive direction – to Source Energy, Divine Energy, Home….whatever your preferred name. God. Self.

If we really knew this deep down and claim it as our Truth – that everything gets better, then I think that this is a stable platform from which to jump off with a leap of faith.

If we were to truly embrace that the belief that everything gets better, it only stands to reason that it will! So, what holds us back? Why are we still not manifesting our desires? I’ll share with you just one of the reasons why we don’t manifest our desires in one single word. Resistance. Our resistance, on so many levels of our psyche is one thing that makes manifesting take so long! It is true what they say – what you resist will persist; hence the Law of Attraction! Becoming aware and understanding our own resistances is key to bridging an important gap in manifesting our desired outcomes.

Think about this….how many times in your life have you knowingly yielded to resistance? I know I have many times over and over again. Why do we resist ourselves? Well, for so many reasons, and perhaps too many to name. But, for many of us we have experienced blocks and restrictions in our work, relationships, and our creativity among other areas of our lives. For example, I have met many amazing and talented artists who have a “block” for getting their work onto paper, or canvas or on stage; unable to really get their work out into the world. So many times I have heard the words, “I’m not good enough….yet” or “selling is not my thing; it makes me uncomfortable” or “I don’t need that kind of attention, to be noticed is so egotistical and self-centered.” Oftentimes, this all boils down to the sense of self-worth. It’s a belief; a false belief or a conditioning. Many of us have not been raised in an environment that tells us we are the magnificent Beings that we truly are! It’s all part of the game, of course. The human game; Spirits experiencing the Self as third dimensional human beings.

However, I think that it’s time for us to step up to the plate baseball : Young hispanic or latino boy with red baseball helmet over a blue hat and ble tee shirt. and become who we are meant to be, to tap into our Divine Infinite; whether it be abundance in monetary wealth, or in love and joy and inner peace. As many of us as there are who study the LoA stuff, there are also many skeptics, and that’s ok. But, these days I’m witnessing many open and consciously aware people who are in the “know” about the LoA, but still don’t quite understand how to push through their own resistances. And, get this! Some of us are resistant to facing our resistance! It can be a scary thing to explore our shadows, right?

We are now in a highly conscious time in our lives and those of us who are expanding our awareness just love to dwell in the realms of the 4th and 5th dimensions. We meditate, we dream, we channel, we are mediums and psychics. It’s so much lighter there, right? Literally! We can go there without the heaviness of our third dimensional bodies and experiences and gain great wisdom, so why not? But, I’m here to remind you that we are here in these human bodies for the sake of experiencing ourselves as third dimensional Beings, too. Yes, it is lovely and juicy to explore other realms and it’s not so sweet living within the density of this physical, material world. However, do we go elsewhere as an escape? Do we partake in spiritual bypass? I know that I, myself have done so! Let’s face it, being in those other realms feels, good!

I propose we take all that we are learning from other dimensions and start applying it to our present day, human lives. We are existing on ALL of these dimensions at once. We are Soul AND we are human; there is no separation, yet we innocently and mistakenly perceive ourselves as separate.

Herein lies another gap in the LoA that needs bridging. Action. I know, I know…I recently read from one of the top dog LoA channelings that if we believe that is “action” is required then it is required in order to manifest. But, let’s ponder this….isn’t making a choice to believe something different an action? When we choose to believe something new that is more in alignment, that choice does absolutely nothing without the action of that choice, yes? Something to think about. Action means implementing our inspirations. If we just sit back, slap a smile on our faces, and think our good thoughts into happiness, it’s just not enough. We must take some kind of action by making new choices and having enough courage to do something different even though it is uncomfortable! SThat is working through our resistances in action! So, I cycle back to my original thought here – if you knew that things get better, then why not take the path of least resistance?

Stay tuned for the next and final article in this series where I’ll be addressing the importance of having clear and concise intentions AND….how does your own personal manifestations want to flow!

Bridging the Gaps in the Law of Attraction

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For many years I have studied and attempted to align with the Law of Attraction (LoA). It has both fascinated me and left me feeling a bit confused. A passionate interest and determination in my spiritual growth has led me through a constant search for tried and true answers and methods. Bottom line question – how do we take Universal principles such as the Law of Attraction and consciously apply them into our third Dimensional, human existence?

Although I love these magnificent, Universal LoA teachings that are channeled through so many around the world, I have always felt there were gaps in it; like there is something else to it that I can’t quite get. Yet, when I go back and re-read some of my books on the subject, it’s all right there in black and white. With that said, however, there seems to be an emphasis on what I would call the “magic bullet” in which I think have caused many people to miss the real point.

Recently, these answers to my questions seem to finally be dropping into my fuller awareness. You see, the LoA seems to be only one part of the equation. It is as if it is only one color of the rainbow. One color does not make a rainbow, but put all the colors together and you have a magical and beautiful miracle, right?

I don’t know about all of you, but from so many of the things I’ve read and listened to in regards to the LoA it seems to boil down to specific and simple three steps. Personally, I love anything simple and methodic so, of course, it is only natural that I gravitate towards this concept – have a desire and think positive thoughts about it, ask for it to manifest and then allow it to come. Poof! Seems like magic, right? Well, it is and it isn’t. On one hand, I’ve had many wonderful, manifesting experiences throughout my life, as well as, I’ve worked with clients who seem to have a natural ability towards aligning with the LoA. But, what about those times in life when things get out of whack?

I had spent many years teaching voice and performance and I continue to dip my creative spirit into the arts from time to time. Several years ago, I segued my professional performing arts career to healing and metaphysical modalities. Now, as a Soul Realignment Practitioner, I utilize my knowledge, skills and experiences as a hypnotherapist, intuitive, and Akashic Record reader. Living this very rich and full life brings many magical experiences and I feel so blessed in that I have been awake enough to embrace and appreciate those moments. But, even though I do consider myself at least slightly above average in the area of conscious awareness (otherwise, I would not be in this profession), but there have also been times of struggle and pain. I suspect that many of you can also relate to these ups and downs throughout life. I think it’s normal – we’re here to experience our human-ness, yes? So, is there a magic bullet out there in the Universe that assures us that all we need to do is think right, ask right and allow right and we get exactly what we want? I guess my answer to that would be no! There is nothing out there, of course, it is all within the Self.

All of us who are seeking need teachers to give us a kick-start and that’s why I love what I do. I would not able to share this information if I did not have my own teachers, mentors and coaches along the way. We all need guidance until we achieve our own momentum. Because of my own asking for guidance, my questions are now manifesting the answers that finally resonate with me. So, this makes me wonder – are there more people out there just like me who have worked with the LoA, but feel like there is something more to it?

In my search for clearer answers, I was guided to read Deepak Chopra’s book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success. I won’t go into depth here, but I do recommend reading this book It’s simple and makes sense if you want to learn more about Universal Law. If there is anything that stuck out for me in that book it’s the Law of Karma – the Law of cause and effect which works hand in hand with our free will and choice. This is why I am passionate about helping others to open up their conscious awareness in my work because without it, we tend to make bad choices.

“You already have the precious mixture that will make you well. Use it.” ~ Rumi

We tend to walk through life with blinders on, not fully aware that we are already empowered to make new and different choices. The only problem sometimes is that we just don’t know how to uncover our Divine Nature and align with Universal Law. So, how does this tie into the LoA and bridging the gaps? There is way too much to share with you here in this one article, so I plan to write a series of articles on the subject. Please stay tuned! I can’t promise that in the end you will see a step-by-step process that you can follow in order to manifest everything you ever wanted. Especially, since each one of you is an individual Soul with your own personal gifts and have your own unique, Divine Soul Purpose. But, I do know that you will have gained a much greater awareness about how Universal Laws can work together so that you can begin creating a blueprint for living a rich, interesting and easier life!

Let’s start with thinking the thoughts we think; which is HUGE in the realm of LoA. I do advocate disciplining our thoughts. Not always a simple task, but it is do-able. The concept that I would like to delve a little deeper into is the concept of “beliefs”. Yes, we can think better thoughts. We can think happier thoughts. But, what IF we have core beliefs that unconsciously block us from being in our Truth about being happy? Now that’s food for thought, isn’t it? Core beliefs reside in the subconscious and some of those core beliefs can be negative. What I mean by “negative” is anything that “negates” or goes against our Divine Nature.

Many people are unwilling to really explore their subconscious beliefs that negate their positive and forward movement. But, just being “happy” is like putting a band-aid on our subconscious parts that block our Divinity; our creative life-force! This only allows us to experience fleeting happy moments, but it does not clean up the “windows” that allow us to peer into our Soul. This is why it is my personal mission to help my clients tap into their Higher Self and work with spirit guidance. To be consciously aware of ourselves allows us to recognize our negating choices which are often derived from negative core beliefs. This is key towards making better choices. You see, the LoA cannot possibly work if we are not making new choices that are congruent with aligning with our Soul’s Divinity.

By now, you may be asking why would anyone really want to rake up all that icky, emotional muck from the past only to re-experience all that pain? Sounds pretty crazy, I know. Emotional pain from our past is awful! But, there are ways to look at your negating choices from a place of detachment and without judgment which I’ll delve into in my next article. Spoiler here – so, if you knew that things can always get better, my question is why would you NOT want to clean your Soul windows in order to experience the LoA through your Divinity?